The Lighter Side ☺ December 2017

Proverbs by six year olds

A 1st Grade Teacher asked her six year old students to complete the second half of some well known proverbs. Their true answers will leave you in stitches.

Don’t change horses…until they stop running.

Strike while the…bug is close.

It’s always darkest before…Daylight Saving Time.

Never underestimate the power of…termites.

You can lead a horse to water, but…how?

Don’t bite the hand that…looks dirty.

No news is…impossible.

A miss is as good as a…Mr.

You can’t teach and old dog new…math.

If you lie down with dogs, you’ll…stink in the morning.

Love all, trust…me.

The pen is mightier than the…pigs.

An idle mind is…the best way to relax.

Where there’s smoke there’s…pollution.

Happy the bride who…gets all the presents.

A penny saved is…not much.

Two’s company, three’s the Musketeers.

Don’t put off till tomorrow what…you put on to go to bed.

Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and…you have to blow your nose.

There are none so blind as…Stevie Wonder.

Children should be seen and not…spanked or grounded.

If at first you don’t succeed…get new batteries.

You get out of something only what you…see in the picture on the box.

When the blind lead the blind…get out of the way.

A bird in the hand…is going to poop on you.

Better late than…pregnant.

Did you Know?

What do you have in December that you don’t have in any other month ?

The letter “D”!

What do you call a letter sent up the chimney on Christmas Eve ?

Black mail!

Why does Father Christmas go down the chimney ?

Because it soots him!

What is a stable?

Every Christmas morning, when my kids were little, I read them the nativity story out of the big family bible.

When my son was old enough to talk, he asked me what a stable was.

I thought for a moment how to explain it to him in terms he could understand, then told him, “It’s something like your sister’s room, but without a stereo.”

Short Snow Jokes

What happened when the snowgirl fell out with the snowboy?

She gave him the cold shoulder!

What do snowmen wear on their heads?

Ice caps!

Where do snowmen go to dance?

Snowballs!

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